Thursday, September 27, 2007

 

Thursday cheers...

.
Ok, ok I know this is an old one...but it's still funny. Sorry I'm making fun of your girlfriends again Ace. Muahaahahhaha!!!

A Kiwi buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.
After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.

The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant.

The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.

The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the
conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself.

So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the
woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they
are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.


Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round.
"Try again." he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls knackered into bed.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass.


"No," she says, "but they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."


# posted by Cocka Doodle @ 8:13 PM 27 Comments

Saturday, September 15, 2007

 

Viva Le France!!!

.I’ll be roughing it out on the couch in the living room on Wednesday, Friday, Saturday & Sunday nights from this week until Oct 20th.

During this period, I’ll be pumping up my body system with lots of caffeine…and occasionally with the help of the ever useful ‘broken in halves’ toothpicks to prop the droopy eyelids.




Yes! It’s that ‘once in every four years’ ritual where nobody can pry the TV remote control from my grasp.

I turn anti-social & shoo away visitors, and make MOHA a widow for a month and a half.






Productivity at work is half-pace and appointments are pushed way back until end Oct as some of the best matches are played at around 3 am.






Last night’s match was truly elating….watching the arrogant pomes being thrashed, beaten to the pulp and humiliated by the Springboks. Yep, I made some money! Thank you for those marvellous kicking, Percy Montgomery.





I recall those fun days where we used to sing the “Ball of Kerrymiur” during the beer frenzies after the matches at SCC or Dieppe Barracks in that tiny red dot down south. How I miss those days.

So this song is dedicated to Suitapui for his cucumber jokes.


Have a good weekend all! Zzzzzzzz………..


# posted by Cocka Doodle @ 3:59 PM 28 Comments

Saturday, September 08, 2007

 

Judgement Day!

.

It never fails to amaze me how quickly some people located thousands of miles can form opinions or perceptions of others without even having to meet them.

It is as if, the act of their judgement is an act of pride viewed from their moral high horse. It involves looking to their own dim-wit narrow perspective, putting together a few perceived facts, figures or fancies, …or worse, just by judging from what others post or comment and coming up with the conclusion if they are good, bad or ugly.

To these bigots, judging others is an act of monumental pride - enormous pride, stupendous pride, galling, astonishing, fantastic pride.

This should be understood. When you render judgement on another, you have taken upon yourself an awesome responsibility for making the correct judgement. Because, in the first place, your judgement is not necessary. But if you persist, then be prepared to be judged likewise.

Often, when you judge people against your benchmarked ‘paradigm’ of right and wrong you failed to realize it is terribly flawed by YOUR inherent biasness.

This in turn leads to the question of acceptance. What is not acceptable to you may not necessarily apply to others. Learn to tolerate and live with it while pondering over what I have said as you are withering away in your twilight years! Senility is not an excuse.

Enjoy the song....I'm sure you would!


# posted by Cocka Doodle @ 1:56 AM 36 Comments

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Subscribe to Posts [Atom]