Saturday, March 18, 2006

 

Bloggers of the round table

It was about 6 pm when I was caught at the infamous Seremban crawl. Instead of getting all worked up and very kan cheong like I usually do in bad traffic situation, I tried picturing what goes on in the other bloggers preparation for the meet:


Zara’s Mama:
ZMM: “Tuyam! Tuyam! Cepat-cepat datang tolong saya tarik ini corset kuat-kuat. Satu, dua, tarik....satu ,dua tarik”
(Tuyam! Tuyam! Come quick and help me bind up this corset. One ,two pull......one two pull!)

Tuyam: “Ya mam…., ummmphh!! Apa pasal malam ini mau pakai corset, mam? Ada dinner penting kah”
(Yes ma'am, ummmmphh!! Why do you need to put on a corset, ma'am? Is there an important dinner tonite?)



ZMM: “Bukan lah! Saya tak mau itu celaka mya Cocka comment saya ada spare tayar lah. Banyak malu lah……cepat tarik kuat lagi, Tuyam”
( No lah! I just don't want that blardy cocka commenting on my spare tyres again. It's embarassing......hurry, pull the cords harder, Tuyam)


Tuyam: “Ummmphhh!!! Ma’am….Banyak susah mau tarik. Saya tarik sini, itu tayar keluar sana, saya tarik sana, dia keluar sini“

(Ummmmphhh!!! Ma'am.....It's hard to bind it. I pull here the tyre sticks out from there, ....I pull there it sticks out from here)

ZMM: “haiyah!”


King’s Wife:
“Cocka commented on my cleavage he saw the blouse I wore to Ipoh. Hmmm….maybe I should wear another one of those Triumph super-duper Maximizer, uplifting, “making mountains out of molehills” bra. He would certainly bowl over when he sees me”













Actual: But I was to be disappointed….because the longkang was all covered up!


Ah May:
“LinPeh said to wear as little as possible. Jomel said better cover up or risk LinPeh talking to those boobs. Cocka said if I have it, I should flaunt it”
I think I’ll take Cocka’s advice.

Standing in front of the mirror, tossing her newly tinted hair, tucked in tummy, sticking out chest and practicing batting eyelids furiously to create sparks;
“Cocka said I got smiling eyes. Must set him on fire tonight”

Actual: Ah May is such a demure, sweet and shy girl in person….and pretty too. There is something in her captivating smile that would tame even the wildest maniac like Lin Peh. She mentioned about starting on her 4th decade, but believe me, she looks like she is only in her 20s ...no crow's feet, no saggy boobs (Lin Peh confirmed this)


I still find it hard to believe she actually wrote Chapter 11 of the Lin Dynasty. She must’ve been possessed then.



Siau Char Boh
“I am going to hiao-hiao with Seng Kor tonight. Since Jomel won’t be coming, I’ll have him all to myself. Wonder spring chicken can last how long hor? What happens if he leaves me high and wet? Never mind, if all else fails still got one old cock there”

Actual: SCB really has the ‘ass-ets’ to hiao hiao wan. I had the privilege to do a quick scan from top to toe when we bump into each other as she was walking to the loo. Boy! You should see her wiggle those love handles!


9393

Thinking to himself:” I must go late-late and make an impressive grand entrance. Wahh….Imagine I come around and everyone introducing themselves to me just like a VVIP saying, Ohh!!! Look! Here comes 9394….what an honor to meet you”

Actual: He came late all right, but he certainly had a hard time guessing who is who because no one introduced themselves. It was rather amusing observing his antics.


Seng Kor
Having a Man to penis heart to heart talk,
“You know, you’ve been with me all these years and I’ve never been with a woman.
Your best friend has always been my clasped hand around you.

But tonight, tonight…..I’m taking you to places you’ve never been. Doing things you’ve never done before. SCB is going to teach you a few tricks. So long virginity”

Actual: Don’t under-estimate this chap. He is quite well known in all the massage joints circles in town. Just walk in to any massage parlor and mention Seng Kor’s name. Chances are SCB look-a-likes are going to swarm you!


Lin Peh

Notorious! Loud mouth, full of profanities!

Actual: Notorious! Loud Mouth and Full of Profanities! ......and these are only the good points! Hahahahahhaaa!!!!!

Rojakz:
In my mind, I really thought this guy would look something like his profile pic. Having seen pictures of his son Lil’ Devil, I would imagine him to be of average built. ........But I was wrong! I was dead wrong!



Actual: Rojakz is L-A-R-G-E. .....H-U-G-E. ........H-U-M-O-N-G-O-U-S!
Geeez! The amount of lard he has, if they so decide to cremate him, he would burn for 3 days and 3 nights . Muahahahaha!!!!


GBYeow & KL Podcast
You guys are being spared from my comments this time around because I don’t know very much about you. In fact, I have not even been to your blogs, but rest assured, I will.

The next time, you won’t be so lucky. Hehe!

To everyone, thank you for a wonderful evening and filling it with so much laughter.
I certainly look forward to the next one. Actually, all of you are a wonderful lot. I am truly glad that we finally met. Thank you all!

Last nite at bout 9pm, I received SMS from Lin Peh:

LP: You check the blog already ah? Anyone posted our faces anot? If yes I'm going to bomb the fucker/fuckee house.

Cocka: No time to check yet. Just got back to JB. Don't worry, your face so fucked up, who dare to post them on their blogs? LOL

LP: Fuck You lah!


Comments:
Wei, that night laugh not enough ah? Make me crack up again!! LOL
You ah, still 'hm fong kor' ZMM. Teruk lah you..........
 
HAHA!! bugger....wat a waste that i missed this joint!! aiyah...
 
diu lor .... how to cari makan ledi now bocor my secret ledi -_-"""
 
*bats eyelashes*... so did I set you on fire that night? LOL!!!

still waters run deep leh... ;)
 
tit...tit... this post is uncommentable...
 
oi can translate the ZMM comment or not ah :P
 
This is the best post!! ROTFL

Seriously, the way u guys are talking about the meet, really make me damn regret for not attending!! lol

Ei, why no mention about your personal preparation b4 the meet??

Cocka looked at the bottle of Indian GOd Oil sitting on his dashboard. He had purchased the oil from a JB mobile pharmacy... run by Tong Shan Jai. Cocka counted his lucky stars for not applying the oil sooner. "Lucky I didn't apply 1st... I'm still caught in the blardy jam! This thing only last 2 hours, u know... ?" Being a shrewd businessman, Cocka understood the phrase, better be ready than sorry.

Cheers. lol
 
Thank Ayah Pin I didn't go. Or else dunno kena what komen from you, tius.
 
KW.....I think I'm going to kena from your SIL again. LOL

yvy.....don't worry. Your time will come when we meet up someday. We will be running around the tables doing the 3 dance, 6 songs routine like all bollywood movies. LOL

Wingz....don't worry. Your secret is still very safe. I only told a few people.

Ah May....yes, you rejuvenated this old frame. But don't tell ppl about the footsies....the roaming hands etc ,ok. GBYeow would bang his head harder against the wall if he finds out. LOL

Ah Pek.....you still have not douse your anger ah? *Psst!** go fark the organizers for sending invitation to wrong address lah. LOL

Ok Flyboy.....done with the translation.

Simple Yank.....We the bloggers of the round table were sworn to secrecy that we will not reveal ourselves. Too many criminals, ex convicts, serial rapist (no prizes for guessing this one)amongst us. LOL

Lin Peh.....Fark you deep-deep again. LOL

Helen.....It would have been a riot if you were there with us. They would have called in the federal reserve squad with tear gas and water cannons!
What Indian god oil are you talking about? The tahan lama mya kah? John ada pakai ah? No wonder you are always in a good mood, smiling from ear to ear. LOL

5xmom.....we must meet up one of this days. Sure you'll fall for my moustache. LOL

SCB.....no! don't do it! I luv them handles. I swear I do....and its no secret! LOL
 
actually i purposely to be late so i can enter with grand welcome mai.
But when i about to enter the building I saw you hiding near a corner, knowning you also use my Sei-Q(style) , I waited until you to go up.You must be thinking you the last person.
Soli bruther, try harder next tme la, lol
 
uncle cocka, tht day i mention ur name i straight got the vvip room. they say that one ur private room wor..
 
Celaka mia Cocka! TNS.. HKL!! How many days and nights you want to taunt me?

I curse you!! And Voo doo you! Next time you serve fish to anybody in a restaurant, sure your misai will get burnt by the candles warming the fish!
 
cocka, you are on! dont aeroplane me ok?? i go n cari the sexy-sexy baju hindustani...lol :P
 
seng kor ti ti,
really ah....cocka the mustache ... so popular there... must ask the nxt time i go there. me and few good frens(remisiers n stock brokers) fr TA securities frequent there. Wat a pity that night was not there otherwise sure will drop in to say Hi.
 
9393.....so it was you who dressed up as the jaga ah? i should have suspected something was amiss because your turban was facing the other way round.

seng kor....ssshhhh!!! don't tell Lin Peh. Did you get vvip treatment also ah?

Zmm.....fuyoh! you can really curse leh! Wow! damn fierce wan! Sending shivers down my spine. Misai get burnt by candle...ROFLMAO. You are cruel...LOL
Ok, ok lah....a thousand apologies, and I promise not to taunt you anymore.
*Cocka offers a bunch of flowers to ZMM, gets down on knees to apologize**

yvy....can, I can sing & dance like Shah Rukn Khan mya. Don't play play. LOL

pt.....West Side Story & Grease is coming to town. Want to go see anot?
 
Sure, u wanna shout me?? I know Grease is but not West Side Story..when?? Goin there tis weekend to book good seats. Via internet ticketcharge cannot choose good seats. First time going to plenary hall so dont know the seating layout ..i meant i saw the layout but dont know how far is fr stage if seating at Rm150 front row, middle of cos, at level 3 OR begining row of Rm200 at level 1. Expensive eh ticket but its ok..been wanting or rather waiting for it to come here. I heard on L & Easy interviewing d organiser..they are bringing in more then 10 20'containers of their barang barang...wow!

btw you know ppl ah to get cheaper tickets ... maybe i can pass out as a student..hahhaha RM75 only..still expensive.
 
West Side Story the musical will be playing at the Durian from 7th-30th April.

For Tue/Wed/Thu/Sun Evening & Sat/Sun Matinee shows:
Standard - S$138, S$128, S$103, S$78
Box Seat - S$158

For Fri/Sat Evening shows:
Standard - S$148, S$138, S$113, S$88
Box Seat - S$158


'Grease' will be from 26th-30th May at the Singapore Indoor Statdium.
Evening 8pm Shows - S$145, S$130, S$95, S$70
Matinee 3pm Shows - S$135, S$120, S$85, S$60

I think I'll catch grease in KL.
 
Err.. you belanjaring us to see ah? Or just me to appease my fury? *whistling*
 
thanks very the much for info. Wah, grease tickets more expensive in Spore but its nearer for you to go Spore than KL. Mar,Apr and May are busy time for me. Well, will see if I can go spore during d last weekend of April to watch W.S.Story.

Hey dear cocka the mustache' ZMM offering peace pipe, better take her to the Musical la.
 
Zmm....'belanjaring us' ah? Just you ok lah......provided Zara's papa won't pluck my feathers hor!

Pt....There's another musical called 'cabaret' starring fei xiang, if you are interested.
 
Lin Peh going to grease on May 20. Evening show ! Who wants follow ? (u pay your own!) ;-)
 
Me, musical freak sure interested. "cabaret" in july right? *sign* wish i live in jb can just hop over nextdoor. why all goods shows dont come by here?? okie m gonna book tickets first, this way sure will not miss out.
hey, thks..ta
 
anon....yep, 22nd july onwards, but tickets go on sale on 1st may. i think because KL do not have a huge market to tap.
Secondly, the arts & cultural ministry gives them very strict dress code on stage...no revealing, see longkang, flashing panties kind of dressing.
 
Hi Jomel! Thanks for stopping by. Its such an honour...**kisses Jomel's hand**

Did you like my serenading you that night?
 
I have been looking for sites like this for a long time. Thank you! » » »
 
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